Star Wars: The Force Awakens (in us)

star wars

By Anne Perry

Posted on January 6, 2016 in Film, Fun Stuff with tags Science Fiction, Star Wars

Yeah, we saw Star Wars: The Force Awakens. And then we saw it again. We possibly saw it again after that, too. We may be looking forward to seeing it again. WE ARE NOT ASHAMED. Let’s talk about why we love it! There are MASSIVE SPOILERS below, so please don’t read if you haven’t seen the film yet.

  1. Finn: You’re awesome.
  2. You humanize the stormtroopers!
  3. You’re super excited about all the cool stuff you get to do once you become a good guy!
  4. You’re a fan of Han Solo!
  5. Who isn’t?
  6. You cheer whenever we cheer!
  7. You’re super into Poe!
  8. LET’S JUST BE HONEST: WHO ISN’T.
  9. You’re a great friend to Rey!
  10. You’ve also got a charming crush on her!
  11. Who doesn’t?
  12. You’re a good shot and a loyal friend!
  13. john bJohn Boyega: Finn is a major character in a major franchise and played by an actor of colour.
  14. That’s brilliant.
  15. You are the son of immigrants and are from Peckham.
  16. That’s awesome.
  17. No one is a bigger Star Wars fanboy than you, John Boyega.
  18. And your American accent is great!
  19. Also you were in Attack the Block, which is a bloody brilliant film.
  20. Could we love you harder, John Boyega?
  21. Nope.
  22. *hugs John Boyega*
  23. Poe: OMG, Poe is played by Oscar Isaac, the internet’s new boyfriend.
  24. Seriously, have you seen Ex Machina? He’s kind of the villain but he’s riveting.
  25. Really. WTF is this thing.
  26. Why has it given us such weird, conflicting feelings.
  27. Side-note: Domhnall Gleeson, who plays Hux, is also in Ex Machina.
  28. Domhnall Gleeson was also in the Harry Potter films, as Bill Weasley.
  29. And he’s Brendan Gleeson’s son. Yeah, Mad Eye Moody.
  30. ANYWAY. Apparently Poe was meant to die at the beginning but they liked Oscar Isaac so much they kept you, Oscar Isaac!
  31. As they should have! You have got so much swagger.
  32. So much.
  33. You are like made of swagger.
  34. You eat, sleep and breathe swagger.
  35. Love you, Poe.
  36. *hugs Poe*
  37. reyREY. 
  38. Omg, Rey.
  39. Girl.
  40. Let’s talk.
  41. Let’s be straight.
  42. Rey.
  43. Rey, you are the best.
  44. You are a badass pilot.
  45. You are a badass warrior.
  46. You are a badass jedi!
  47. omfg omfg omfg
  48. We got shivers when you called the light sabre to yourself.
  49. Shivers.
  50. *all the feels*
  51. WHO ARE YOU, REY.
  52. ARE YOU LEIA’S DAUGHTER.
  53. ARE YOU LUKE SKYWALKER’S DAUGHTER.
  54. ARE YOU… RELATED TO BEN KENOBI?
  55. WHO
  56. ARE
  57. YOOOOUUUUUU
  58. We <3 U 4ever, Rey.
  59. leiaIn all seriousness, we are so excited that the lead character in SW:TFA is a woman who is amazing at so much stuff. But the jedi thing is so huge. As a kid we were always so desperate for kick-ass female characters in the films we loved AND LOOK LOOK LOOK AT REY.
  60. SO AMAZING.
  61. And SHE’S NOT THE ONLY ONE.
  62. There are four major female characters in SW:TFA.
  63. Compare that to the abysmal 63 seconds of dialogue for any non-Leia female characters in the original trilogy.
  64. (We are not considering the prequels because we are old-school Star Wars geeks and those broke us a little, inside.)
  65. (As did the 1997 re-release of the original Star Wars, the first one with all of Lucas’ flim-flammery.)
  66. (We stood in line for hours to see that.)
  67. (We were so excited.)
  68. (Finally: Star Wars! On the Big Screen!)
  69. (It was going to be huge!)
  70. (It was huge.)
  71. (A huge disappointment.)
  72. (We will never, ever forget what a huge disappointment it was.)
  73. (Nor will we ever really forgive.)
  74. *glares*
  75. ANYWAY.
  76. Leia.
  77. Leia, you are the best. You were the best shot in the original trilogy.
  78. You were a hardcore badass leader.
  79. NOW YOU’RE EVEN HARDER CORE AND BADDER ASS.
  80. And probably an even better shot now, because you’ve had even more time to practice.
  81. General of my heart.
  82. Carrie Fisher, you are also the best.
  83. You have been so, so awesome on this endless press tour for the film. You’ve been honest about the difficulties, the strains and the pressures of your life between 1977 and now, the highs and the lows and and everything you’ve gone through.
  84. That honesty is so refreshing.
  85. And also hilarious.
  86. Queue to adopt Carrie Fisher as your naughty aunt forms behind us.
  87. LEST WE NOT FORGET: Gary Fisher.
  88. *hugs Gary Fisher*
  89. And we’re going to need that hug, because next up is…
  90. Han Solo.
  91. han soloOh, Han.
  92. *weeps*
  93. We didn’t realize you were going to be a main character in the new film.
  94. In fact, we were so delighted at the way the new film integrated the beloved characters from the original films – they weren’t just cameos, but full roles, and made Force feel like a true continuation of the original series’ stories.
  95. But.
  96. Omg.
  97. Han.
  98. Oh, Han.
  99. *weeps*
  100. Harrison Ford, this is the first time we’ve seen you in a film in years where you don’t look and sound… totally exhausted.
  101. Let’s be honest, that last Indiana Jones film kind of broke all of us, didn’t it?
  102. SO GOOD TO SEE YOU, HAN.
  103. AND HARRISON. Welcome back.
  104. Speaking of people who are good to see again:
  105. CHEWIE.
  106. YOU BIG HAIRY HUGGABLE MONSTER.
  107. C’mere and hug us.
  108. Make that weird noise.
  109. You are probably the best hugger.
  110. (Behind Finn.)
  111. Love you, Chewie.
  112. *hugs*
  113. Kylo Ren.
  114. Dude.
  115. Your hair-game is on point.
  116. kylo renSeriously, is that some sort of Dark Side thing?
  117. Tell us your conditioning secrets.
  118. We must know.
  119. You grumpy big baby, you.
  120. BB-8
  121. Little round droid, we had our doubts about you.
  122. *horrible Jar-Jar Binks flashbacks*
  123. But you were so legitimately cute!
  124. With your little flame-thrower thumbs-up
  125. and the way you bumped down the stairs
  126. and your fandroiding of R2D2.
  127. Please join us in an R2D2 air-punch
  128. because we love R2D2.
  129. (Whom we always think of as ‘Are-two Day-Towah)
  130. (thanks for that, 3PO!)
  131. ANYWAY
  132. SPEAKING OF
  133. WE WERE NOT BEST PLEASED BY C3PO
  134. THE RED ARM THING WAS ADORABLE
  135. BUT HITTING R2D2 WAS A STEP BEYOND
  136. and honestly, the ‘princesses!’ joke was a gross reminder of that icky old fashioned humor that relied on sweeping stereotypes about women, like ‘my wife got into another fender-bender today! Women, am I right, lads?’
  137. Gross.
  138. Star Wars, you’re better than that.
  139. Right.
  140. Who’ve we missed?
  141. Oh, right.
  142. FREAKING LUKE SKYWALKER
  143. luke skywalkerThe hand!
  144. The beard!
  145. The piercing gaze!
  146. The… jedi temple?
  147. Luke, what have you been doing for the last X-number of years all alone out there?
  148. hopefully learning the mandolin or something.
  149. And not dwelling.
  150. Dwelling does no one any good.
  151. Seriously, consider Kylo Ren.
  152. Dude is a dweller.
  153. Don’t be a dweller, Luke.
  154. BUT JUST LOOK AT YOU
  155. GONE FULL OBI-WAN KENOBI
  156. WITH THE BEARD AND THE PIERCING GAZE
  157. Dude, Luke, we totally missed you.
  158. Remember when you were just a whiny brat?
  159. NO MORE.
  160. NOW YOU ARE A BADASS JEDI MASTER
  161. Possibly a slightly insane one, what with living on a deserted island on a deserted planet for years all by yourself.
  162. NO JUDGEMENT.
  163. YOU DO YOU, LUKE SKYWALKER.
  164. Meanwhile, Mark Hamill, you are a treasure.
  165. *flails*
  166. The Joker! The signatures! All the clowning around!
  167. *flails more*
  168. kermit flailWhat else?
  169. PHASMA. MAZ KANATA. HUX. SNOKE.
  170. so many good, solid, interesting characters!
  171. so much scope for a fantastic sequel.
  172. and another fantastic sequel.
  173. What else can we say?
  174. We are excite.
  175. *flails*

Comments

3 comments on “Star Wars: The Force Awakens (in us)”

  • Glen Mehn says:

    Luke has been growing his beard and making a Movember mockumentary on his ukelele. OBVIOUSLY.

  • Lidija says:

    My absolute favourite scene was Rey and Leia hugging. Those sort of simple interactions are the things that Hollywood usually does either very badly or not at all.

  • Jeremy Large says:

    I had my issues with The Force Awakens, but I definitely think that one thing they got right was the little details – like Luke’s expression when he sees his lightsaber – it’s pretty much the exact expression on his face when Yoda confirms his parentage.

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